If you’re asking the question, it’s probably a good time.

Talking to someone about your life (or your child’s) and finding “recipes” for new tastes in yourself or your relationships can be helpful when the world feels like it’s ending, when you’re feeling a little blue or edgy, or when you’re raring to become a better person.

Asking about going to counseling is like asking when it’s good to go the gym or start an exercise routine. It’s healthy and daunting to begin.

Sitting with a stranger and opening up your deepest self can feel a little unnerving. Questions like “How do you feel about that?” or “What do you notice physically coming up in your body as you recall that situation?” dig deeper than we’re used to people asking. Paying attention to underneath the surface can feel like lifting weights with unused muscles. 

Personally, the first time I sat down with a therapist my biggest fear was being judged.

So, at what point is it worth opening up, and paying money to “talk with someone?” Perhaps the best answer may seem a tiny bit backwards, but when we most fear it, may be a time we most need it. When we are afraid of being judged, it’s often because we need someone to see that we are struggling and hurting deeply—and not look down on us. Generally, when we ask the question it means we’re sensing a need for a little caring or outside perspective. 

But it still feels scary. After all, what if our fears of being judged are right? What if the therapist declares us to be “not enough?” What if we find out we’re too broken for repair?” What if it’s a waste of time and money? 

Whether or not we are aware of our emotions does not determine whether or not we are experiencing them, or they are in the background running the show. Difficult emotions haven’t withered away. Their likely just covered over or suppressed. Often, when we feel stuck repeating the same unhealthy patterns, or are ready to change, it’s because something inside of us needs careful attention or needs to experience a shift. Or, even if we aren’t ready to shift yet, we need to be seen, heard and cared for.

People are more willing to embark on a healing path when they start to truly feel seen and safe. In therapy, our goal is to create the conditions for you to feel safe within yourself, and for your child to experience safety with themselves. 

Call or email today if you want to chat more or make an appointment.  Learn how you can calm, feel safe inside your own skin and grow in your availability to connect with those who mean the most to you.